Missed opportunities

My dad has always had a lot of good ideas for intentions.  There are several products that have come to market in the past fifteen years that I can clearly remember him suggesting before the actual "inventor" came up with them and made them happen.  For example, he always said how he wanted an LED scrolling panel in the back window of his car so he could share his feelings with motorists behind him--in Botswana sometimes the finger isn't clearly understood.  And I have to admit, being able to flash "Go Fuck Yourself!" to a guy tailgating you does seem like a great idea.  I even suggested that you could have one mounted on the front of your car that displayed mirror-writing so drivers in front of you could read it in their rear view mirrors.  Step on it, Grandma!"  Genius, right?  Well, lo and behold, I saw a product very similar to that which I just described in a catalogue the other day.  And that sucks, because my dad totally invented that fifteen years ago.  

Anyway, growing up I always said that if I had good ideas I would make sure I developed the product and made some money in the process.  So shopping for baby clothes...b o r i n g.  The Gap tries to spice things up a little bit by having cute sayings on the front--"Monkey Business" and a picture of a monkey.  Precious, sure.  But, I thought to myself, wouldn't it be great to market a line of baby clothes with dark humor printed on them?  Yes, indeed that would be a fantastic idea.  Lots of people my age like dark humor and lots of people my age are having kids.  Well last night I was looking for baby clothes online (yes, my life is that gloriously exciting) and what do I come across?  A website that sells the very clothes I thought up.  And instead of making a hundred thousand dollars off the plan, what did I do?  Yup, I spent $40 on two articles of clothing, and contributed big time to their hundred thousand dollars.  Damn it.

I will say though, that that site has some damn funny baby clothes.  A shirt with a picture of a fifth of Jack Daniels on it, with the text "Mommy Drinks Because I Cry." Or "He Thinks He's my Daddy." One of my favorites was a picture of a toilet roll, "Don't Forget to Wipe My Ass!"  Another: a picture of a rainbow, "They're Raising Me Gay!"  or a recycling sign with "Made from Recycled Genetic Material" printed below it.

So I clearly missed the boat on those, but I think I have another plan.  Little kids apparently love to dress the same as their parents--god help them--but it seems like it would be hard to find matching  clothes that weren't from Wal-Mart.  So maybe I'll come out with funny matching clothes.  You could have a mommy and daughter t-shirts that said "Mini-Me" for the mom, and "Please Tell Me My Ass Isn't Going to be That Big!" for the daughter.  Or maybe a matching father and son get-up with a kid's shirt that says "I Wet the Bed" and the dad's saying "Bet He'll Take an Interest in Reading Now."  The possibilities are endless.  Anyone want to invest?